Winston “Nate” Simmons clearly remembers May 15, 2020, like it was yesterday.
It was moving day. He packed his belongings – clothes, shoes and books – to move from a group home to his Direct Support Professional (DSP) Ethel Bridges’ house. Ethel would now be his primary caregiver through Monarch’s Alternative Family Living (AFL) service.
“I was excited. I was very excited. This is going to be a good thing,” Nate shares. “We are going to have a wonderful time and figure out our differences. I really want to be here so she can help me be high functioning.”
What is AFL?
Alternative Family Living provides individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities (I/DD) the opportunity to live within a family setting. Families like Ethel’s are approved to offer this service, helping to create a natural, supportive environment where the individual can thrive.
A New Beginning for Nate
Before moving in with Ethel, Nate had been a resident at Monarch’s Bessemer City Group Home in Gastonia. Ethel worked at the group home and was so familiar with Nate’s needs that even when she wasn’t working, staff would ask for her advice.
Ethel had always wanted to be an AFL provider, and when the group home closed in 2020, she knew Nate would benefit from the one-on-one support that AFL offers. After receiving permission from Nate’s legal guardian, the decision was made.
Nate, 42, is diagnosed with I/DD, schizophrenia, and bipolar disorder. He sometimes experiences anxiety, nightmares and difficulty expressing his feelings. Ethel’s calm guidance helps him navigate these challenges.
How AFL Helps Individuals Thrive
Since moving in with Ethel, Nate has made remarkable progress, learning coping skills and socially appropriate behaviors. Ethel affectionately calls him “Nate the Great,” while he refers to her as “Miss Ethel.” Her four adult children treat Nate like a brother, and he is included in family celebrations and holidays.
Ethel is proud of Nate’s growth and helps nurture his interests. He enjoys drawing clouds and lighthouses, listens to the weather forecast each morning and is an avid Pittsburgh Steelers fan. He also enjoys shopping for his clothes and listening to country music. During the week, he attends the Opportunity Awaits adult day program in Gastonia.
The Benefits of AFL
Monarch’s Vice President of Operations for Long-Term Services and Supports, shares that AFL provides the most natural living arrangement for people with I/DD outside of their own families. “The AFL provider agrees to care for them as a family member, integrating them into daily life, which may include church, recreational activities, family gatherings or vacations,” she explains. “AFL has proven to be a successful long-term solution for individuals needing this type of care.”
Nurturing Nate’s Future
Caring for others was ingrained in Ethel from a young age. Her mother taught her how to care for family, especially family members with I/DD. Back then, special needs were not often discussed but Ethel learned that these individuals simply needed more love and attention.
“He is like a son from another mother,” says Ethel. “He is special to me because he is the first person I have had in my home with intellectual challenges, and he shows us how intellectually challenged we all are.”
As part of the Bridges family, Nate has daily responsibilities, including keeping his room clean, vacuuming and folding clothes. Ethel’s home is regularly inspected as part of the AFL program and she ensures medications are stored properly. Her two-story home, located in a quiet cul-de-sac, is equipped with safety features. Ethel is also grateful for her neighbors who look out for Nate as part of the community.
Looking Ahead
When asked about his future, Nate talks about getting married one day, living in a one-story house, and owning a green, red or brown car.
Ethel is optimistic about Nate’s continued growth. “Your diagnosis doesn’t define who you are. One day, I look forward to seeing Nate become independent, even though it may be a long journey. I live with him and I see the potential,” she shares.
Click here to watch a video on Monarch’s YouTube channel and hear Nate and Ethel in their own words describe what AFL has meant to them.
Interested in AFL Services?
If you or someone you know could benefit from the AFL program, visit here to learn more.